


JadeKat AU Drabbles (All One-shots)

by woke_up_on_derse



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Centaurstuck, Every Chapter is Different, F/M, dragonstuck, just general jadekat au fuckery
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-10
Updated: 2015-03-10
Packaged: 2018-03-17 06:59:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,014
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3519734
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/woke_up_on_derse/pseuds/woke_up_on_derse
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes people ask me to write AU JadeKat for them and who am I to say no?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This hunk of sappiness was requested by enigmaticelegies.tumblr.com
> 
> They actually didn't ask for it to be dragonstuck but I supplied it anyway. The original prompt was just "jadekat cuddles" but I felt like dragons so here they are.

It was never that long of a flight to him. As much as he denied his love of his friends and protested the mere idea of living next to them, his actions sure didn’t mirror that desire to be alone. He didn’t even live on a proper island; it was more of a peninsula attached to Sollux. Granted, the pathway to get to where Sollux lived by land is burnt to all hell and back from all of their “friendly-fire” fights but that didn’t mean he couldn’t fly it.

You land on the burnt bottleneck of the peninsula and the ground makes a satisfying crunch beneath you. You step on a crunchy-looking log for the sake of the sound. An earthy waft of wet soil and plant-rot guide you to where his cave lies, secluded behind some kind of tropical flowering tree like a proper fucking dragon. You’d call the trees mimosas but they appear a bit too red and a bit too tall for that. Regardless, you nudge past them and stick your head in. 

“Helllooooo? Anybody home? Of course you’re home. Where else would you be, you big dork?” your spines scratch through shallow trenches you made in his ceiling long ago. The tree that made a snapping sound behind you is new, however. You turn what little you can and register that, yes, you did in fact swat a tree down with your tail. Better watch that. His stubby tail can’t swat down anything no matter how rapidly he flicks so of course he didn’t plan for that. At least they aren’t the matchstick aspens that cover Nepeta’s grotto. Poor Nepeta has a tail like a snipped pitbull. 

Tail between your legs, literally, you all but tiptoe into his cave. “Hello? I know you’re here, you just aren’t answering. Why aren’t you answering? Why don’t you love me?” That last one is a joke, but it usually works. 

As if on cue, you hear a quickly drawn in breath. A familiar voice calls out “That’s a totally unfounded accusation. Also probably heresy.” 

“Heresy, did you say? Further proof that I am a goddess.” you trustingly plunge into the darkness of his cave. “Where have you squirreled yourself away this time?”

“Since I am being gracious, I will gift you a hint. Here it is: I don’t have night vision. Find the light and there I am.”

You’re positively dripping with sarcasm when you snort out “Well of course. You always were the light of my life.”

“Damn straight.”

The cave isn’t too big so it doesn’t take you very long at all to find your baby prince curled up by his fireplace. He learned to breathe fire last year and ever since then he has been using every opportunity to light up the world. Karkat spits a single flame into the pit even though the fire is still roaring along just as a way to let you know, without a doubt, that he was the one who made it. The glow of the fire illuminates your lover but only hardly. Stray strands of light sporadically flicker up his face but never quite make it to his horns; his belly, however, is completely visible. Target acquired, you go in for the kill.

He tries to stop you by rolling over once he sees what you’re doing but it’s too late. You undo his aborted turn by pawing him down onto his back and holding him there. Once he’s where you want him, you dip your head down as if to nuzzle his stomach but instead blow a hot, wet raspberry onto his belly and watch his muscles jump as he tries to escape.

“Fuck! Jade, I’m gonna roast the individual cells off of your face if you don’t- Aaaugh, Jade!” he says as you deliver another perfectly executed raspberry. “Get the holy hell away from me.”

In response, you flop onto him. You’re about 4 feet longer than him and it shows when you cover him completely. His protests die down into a mumble and a grunt. He really does love sharing the chill that runs through your veins and you love the way his fever flesh warms something deep within your chest cavity. Approximately 30 seconds after he stops yelping and yelling at you to stop, a low but thorough rumble travels through every square inch of skin you share, this human disease called love metastasizing.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This one was actually just a little thing I did for school. I really, really wanted jadekat to be in my school's literature magazine.

“The answer to number nine is zero point zero zero.”

“No, it’s zero point zero eight. Everybody knows that.”

“No, that’s only if they’re over 21. You can’t drink at all if you’re under 21.” she leans over his shoulder, “Everybody knows that.”

“Oh, shoot.” He tries to erase his answer but only succeeds in smudging it before giving in and simply crossing it out.

“Why do you even bother? Even if you ace the test, they’re not gonna let you drive.”

“Hah. If I don’t drive, how am I gonna get places? Running? I don’t think so.”

She mumbles “Not like being too slow is really much of a problem for you anyway, Kat. You’re as fast as, oh I dunno, a horse.”

Kat pretends he didn’t hear her and continues “Anyway, I found a way to sit down in a car. You just recline the seat the full way and tuck your legs under you so you’re laying flat but put one leg out so you can work the pedals. It’s perfectly safe and I. Will. Pass.”

“What about seat belts?”

“......... I’ll figure it out.” Kat says, mostly to himself.

She leans over to kiss his ear but he flicks it back before she can get there. Pulling his beanie over his fluffy ears, he growls. “Don’t patronize me, Jade.”

“Pfffft. Haha. You take yourself waaaaaay too seriously. Call me back when you’re ready for my help.” She moves to the door but not before flicking his nubby, adolescent antlers from under the stretched-out beanie desperately trying to hide them. “Or maybe once you realize that centaurs aren’t meant to have driver’s licenses.”


End file.
